Friends have been enquiring about how I spent the Christmas Eve and the New Year Eve. My answer is in this blog.
Hyderabad loves to party. The Hyderabadis party to celebrate when something good happens, such as India winning any Cricket one-day match or series (which nowadays Indians do, like clockwork, every time.) When something bad happens, they party to cheer themselves up. When nothing is happening, they party because they are bored. Sometimes they party because there is no reason to party!
I had a close friend in Hyderabad who used to be a party animal. If there was a party, he was there, and he did not leave until it was over. Even then, he did not always leave. Sometimes the people, who threw the party, if they wanted to get rid of him, had to move. Even then he would get into another party. Like Pub Hopping Party Hopping! And could he hold drinks… to say the least, he can put a beer cask to shame! Wikipedia will tell you that a beer cask, over a period of time, changed from 36 gallon capacity to 32 gallon. But it is the reverse for him.
Though I could never party the way these people do, I consider myself a Party Dude (mind you, not a Party Animal.) Beyond two drinks (which has always been my quota, ration or allowance since I started drinking) I will go speechless. I don’t become boisterous… I don’t make a scene. If I am forced to have my third drink, I just sleep after that. But people love me for that! You know why… there are always a few in such parties, who feel better because they can hold more drinks and I am giving them the opportunity to act concerned. They will try and wake me up by making me smell the lime… they will tell others that they will take care of me while going back home.
I was thinking about this recently at a party in Chennai. And mind you, in Chennai I don’t attend sedate parties like I used to in Hyderabad. These are parties where boys and girls, bunch up together in their most skimpy costumes that can be worn only after the evening twilight. There is so much of noise and ruckus you will feel out of place soon. There is some nudity at these parties as well… when a guest removes all of his or her garments, including diaper, and sprints around squealing, pursued by a parent terrified that the child is about to make peepee on the carpet of semi-complete strangers. Yes dudes… I am talking about the birthday parties of children. Only these I am allowed to attend after moving over to Chennai.
So there I was, holding a balloon puppy that had been made for some kid by the party clown. (All children's birthday parties are now required, under Indian Penal Code, to have a clown. If you don't have one, armed guards of the Indian Department of Child Whimsical Welfare will come to your home and forcibly paint your face.) That was when a chilling thought flashed across my mind: What has happened to me
How did I -- a person who would have once made the front page of the newspaper in AP, for having chosen to sleep on the Bar Counter of 10 Downing Street after SMELLING some liquor is now holding a Cone Ice-cream on one hand and Cotton Candy on the other – and how did I turn into a person enthusiastically thrusting a balloon puppy in reaction to watching a baby strip? Is my life really this dull now? Have I turned into a pathetic old person like Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman? Should I also draw up my Bucket List
Yes, this is how I, Former Party Dude, am currently spending my leisure time. And now my friends have the answer to how I spent those two important evenings!
Hyderabad loves to party. The Hyderabadis party to celebrate when something good happens, such as India winning any Cricket one-day match or series (which nowadays Indians do, like clockwork, every time.) When something bad happens, they party to cheer themselves up. When nothing is happening, they party because they are bored. Sometimes they party because there is no reason to party!
I had a close friend in Hyderabad who used to be a party animal. If there was a party, he was there, and he did not leave until it was over. Even then, he did not always leave. Sometimes the people, who threw the party, if they wanted to get rid of him, had to move. Even then he would get into another party. Like Pub Hopping Party Hopping! And could he hold drinks… to say the least, he can put a beer cask to shame! Wikipedia will tell you that a beer cask, over a period of time, changed from 36 gallon capacity to 32 gallon. But it is the reverse for him.
Though I could never party the way these people do, I consider myself a Party Dude (mind you, not a Party Animal.) Beyond two drinks (which has always been my quota, ration or allowance since I started drinking) I will go speechless. I don’t become boisterous… I don’t make a scene. If I am forced to have my third drink, I just sleep after that. But people love me for that! You know why… there are always a few in such parties, who feel better because they can hold more drinks and I am giving them the opportunity to act concerned. They will try and wake me up by making me smell the lime… they will tell others that they will take care of me while going back home.
I was thinking about this recently at a party in Chennai. And mind you, in Chennai I don’t attend sedate parties like I used to in Hyderabad. These are parties where boys and girls, bunch up together in their most skimpy costumes that can be worn only after the evening twilight. There is so much of noise and ruckus you will feel out of place soon. There is some nudity at these parties as well… when a guest removes all of his or her garments, including diaper, and sprints around squealing, pursued by a parent terrified that the child is about to make peepee on the carpet of semi-complete strangers. Yes dudes… I am talking about the birthday parties of children. Only these I am allowed to attend after moving over to Chennai.
So there I was, holding a balloon puppy that had been made for some kid by the party clown. (All children's birthday parties are now required, under Indian Penal Code, to have a clown. If you don't have one, armed guards of the Indian Department of Child Whimsical Welfare will come to your home and forcibly paint your face.) That was when a chilling thought flashed across my mind: What has happened to me
How did I -- a person who would have once made the front page of the newspaper in AP, for having chosen to sleep on the Bar Counter of 10 Downing Street after SMELLING some liquor is now holding a Cone Ice-cream on one hand and Cotton Candy on the other – and how did I turn into a person enthusiastically thrusting a balloon puppy in reaction to watching a baby strip? Is my life really this dull now? Have I turned into a pathetic old person like Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman? Should I also draw up my Bucket List
Yes, this is how I, Former Party Dude, am currently spending my leisure time. And now my friends have the answer to how I spent those two important evenings!

dept of child whimsical welfare?? ha ha ha! im not gonna stop laughing for that one for a loong time!
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